BECOMING A FOSTER CARER. What is Fostering: Caring for children in need in your own home. Protecting and Safeguarding them from abuse. Meeting their current and future needs, with health issues, education, social, financial, emotional, religious, exercise, social contacts. To make them welcome in a safe environment and show them love.
Becoming a Foster Carer was my long time plan to keep myself busy after retirement.
To help young persons who are less privileged.
To put happiness into people's lives
To make their dreams come true.
''To Save and to Serve"
I worked in various aspects of Nursing since 1973 to 2014.
I started as a Midwife, followed by General Nursing, to Public Health Nurse, and to Mental Health Nurse.
I retired from the NHS in 2014.
In 2004, I thought of my plan B after Nursing, and put in place, plan C, In case if I decide to stop working as a bedside Nurse, which was very stressful, due to the shifting duties, a lot changes, due to mass migration from other countries and changes of policies and Legislation in the NHS. I wanted to continue to contribute joy and happiness to another person's life, as I was doing as a Nurse.
My Plan C, was, what I can continue to do, when I retired from the NHS, to keep me busy while I am still physically active.
I read about Fostering from Nursing Times, Journals, media, and I asked from from friends.
I became aware that any responsible adult can be a Foster Carer, provided you meet all the requirements and you have a spare room.
I applied to do Skills to Fostering Training in 2004.
Training was scheduled for 2005 at the Upminster.
I met people of different Nationalities, different professionals, and house wives with experience olf looking after children. We became friends soon as we commenced the training. Exchanging phone numbers.
My Assessment was carried out by an Independent Social Worker. It took a longer period than I expected.
At last, I was approved by the Panel.
These days, it takes six months.
Very thorough, intrusively important because of the Law of the Country, regarding looking after children.
My Earliest memories of been a new Foster Carer:
I was so exited, the fact that I was allowed to do part time job in my work place, because I choose to Foster.
I got a lot of information about Fostering from the Fostering and the Leaving Care Team. They are very supportive.
I attended meetings, training meeting new people, Professionals involved with care. Social Workers, Teachers, Doctors, Psychologists, Young Persons Advisers, Interpreters, Solicitors and the Home Office.
TSDS portfolio has to be completed within the first year.
Awareness of the Policies and the Legislation of Children Services.
Ability to cope with challenges From parents of foster child, such as questioning the abilities of Foster Carers.
Taking anger and frustrations on the Foster Carer, by the Young Person, and their Birth parents.
Lark of Trust from Foster Child, due to the experience that lead to living with a Foster Parent.
Challenges and Rewards:
Challenges: The challenges I faced as a Foster Carer is enormous. There are lots of compromises. One needs to adjust to a lot of things in the household. Your privacy will be compromised. You need to be patient, resilient, tolerant, adapt to other cultures. Living with a stranger in your own house is not an easy thing to do.
I discussed how fostering will change my life, and now I will adjust. During the holiday period, when my grandchildren use to stay in my house for few days, when they visit, that stopped. I explained to my grandchildren that I will be visiting them, that we have to create rooms for those who are less privileged and those who need help.
I explained that environment. Poverty, war, unrest, domestic violence, financial exploitation, sexual abuse, emotional abuse, Psychological abuse, religious, sickness, bereavement, divorce, can cause a life changing for any child to be fostered.
It was a life changing for me too, for the the way I go on holidays changed completely.
I learnt how to cope with families and foster children.
My family were happy when I told them.
Getting everything ready in the house.
New beddings. Changing the carpets and adhere to health and safety issues.
A lot of preparation took place.
First placement took place, soon as I was approved.
It was so challenging because it involved the YOS, the Police and the Prison.
Getting the full information about the Young Person soon as the Placement started.
I started the Assessment, planning, Implementation and evaluation of care.
Maintaining good record keeping.
Respecting Equality and Diversity Act.
Maintaining confidentiality.
Make the impossible possible. We can make it happen.
Maintaining the 5 Outcomes of Fostering is important in the care of any child.
Every Child Matters which was introduced in the year 2003, after a lot of failures from the health system in the Country.
For every child to be healthy, So that they are physically, mentally, emotionally and sexually healthy.
Have health lifestyles, and choice not to take illegal drugs.
Stay Safe:
At home and in the Public.
Provide adequate beddings, in a warm/dry habitable house.
All electric gargets to be safe, boiler, cooker, fridge/freezers, to be safe.
Storage of food has to be adequate.
*Be Healthy. Eat healthy foods.
So that they are physically, mentally, emotionally and sexually healthy. Live healthy lifestyles and encouraged and advice, not to take illegal drugs.
* Stay Safe.
From maltreatment, neglect, violence, sexual exploitation, accidental injury and death, bullying and discrimination, crime and anti-social behaviour in and out og school, have security and stability and are cared for.
Let them be aware of where they can get help if they are in difficulty.
To speak to the Teachers, S/W, Police
*Enjoy and Achieve.
So that they are ready for school or College that they attend, enjoy their studies and achieve.
stretching national educational standards at primary and secondary school, achieve personal and social development and enjoy recreation.
*Making a Positive Contribution.
So that they engage in decision- making, support their community and environment, engage in law-abiding and positive behaviour in and out of school, develop positive relationships, choose not to bully and discriminate, develop set confidence, successfully deal with significant life changes and challenges and develop enterprising behaviour.
*Achieving Economic Well-being.
So that they engage in further education, employment or training on leaving school, are ready for employment, live in decent homes and sustainable communities, have access to transport and material goods, live in households free from low income.
The Assessment Team Social Worker are assigned to accompany the Young Person to the Placement, arrange placement meeting, immediately or within few days in placement
Some times, the arrival to Placement might be late afternoon, depends on when they arrive back to the office from the Home Office.
Depends on when the Assessment Social Worker finish with the Home Office paper work, and leaves the home, where the Young Person was residing for few days.
Some Unaccompanied Minors are picked up by the Police on the streets and are brought straight to the Children Services. These are emergency placements.
On Arrival to Placement:
The Young Person is introduced to the Foster Carer.
You can observe a lot from the body language and the facial expressions of the YP.
Expectations of the Refugee Asylum seekers are so high. I would let them be aware, that a flat, or your own house will Not be giving to you, as soon as you arrive in your host Country. You will either stay with a Foster Carer, or share semi- independent accommodation with other Young Persons, depending on your age. There are policies and legislations in place for accommodations. You can not forcibly change our policy because of what you want, We live by rules and order. We embrace diversity. You have to respect people, old or young, male or female. People work tirelessly to own their their individual homes, paying mortgages, house rents, Gas and electricity bills, water, television and Wi fi, maintaining the property, Insurances, Mobile phones, Council tax, Car insurance, petrol and parking areas, road taxes, and maintaining the family. Nothing is free. If you are welcome in your host Country warmly, please be contented, and show gratitude. Focus on why you left your homeland. Focus on achieving your goals and objectives. Please do not believe in what the human traffickers are telling you before you leave your Countries that money grow on trees in the UK or where ever you go abroad.
Assessment: The physical appearance: If the YP is thin and pale.
Psychological: If the YP is tearful, fearful, emotionally distressed, restless, unable to maintain eye contacts. Stress incontinence, weak.
Sweating and not communicating.
Clothes worn by the YP, might need changing, and what is inside the small bag that he or she carries might be few belongings. You need to check and record it.
Placement Planning Meeting has to be arranged, set date and time by the Assessment Social Worker who brought the YP to Placement and informing the Foster Carer immediately soon as the date and time is set and agreed by the Team.
The Social Worker need to obtain fifty pounds gift voucher to buy clothes initially, soon as the YP arrives in placement. This is to assist the Foster Carer.
The clothes money will be included in the allowance, paid to the Foster Carer.
Care Planning by the Foster Carer under the 5 Dimensions of care.
Obtain letter from the Social Service, confirming that the YP is looked after by the Children Services, under Section 20, London Borough of Havering.
You will need to show this letter to be able to register the YP in various places.
Photocopies will be needed where ever it is requested.
Register the YP with your family GP surgery, Dentist, Optician, in your local area.
Solicitors
Introduce the YP to a Solicitor who will be able to register him his asylum applications and represent him in the Home Office.
After the registration, he will obtain the Biometric Card from the Home Office, as an identification card. This is not a card for getting a job. No public funds
The Solicitors will follow up his application the Immigration Asylum Application
Always show his Biometric Immigration card from the Home Office.
School, College, GP surgery, will not register the YP without the Temporary Biometric Card, issued by the Home Office, and a letter, "To Whom it may Concern" signed by the YP SW.
Communication with the YP.
Language Barrier between the Foster Carer and the YP.
Google Translate could be used for the Vietnamese, Iran, Afghanistan, Iraq, or any Country that English Language is not used.
It might not be available in all languages.
This will help and ease any frustration in communication with each other.
Travelling and knowing places.
YP has to be accompanied to everywhere for the first 3 months.
The Road Signs, what the traffic lights meant, how to use the zebra crossings, the bridges to cross over in Train stations. The YP has never lived in the UK before. He or she will be confused to cross the road or to go to places on his own.
This depends on mental capacity of the YP to catch up quickly. Some are forgetful and you need to repeat things as many times as possible.
Plan Interesting places to visit, such as the Westminster, the Zoo, Chessington world of adventures, London Eye, Boats tour, Madam Tonsures. Local events organised by the Virtual School, or the College.
Take the YP to his own Community Restaurants, and place of worship.
Nutritional Needs. Appropriate food. Drinks. Offer chocolate drink, Coca-Cola or any drink available when he arrives. Every one eats bread and fried eggs.
Please be ware of sausages, sausage rolls, bacon, and any pork products. Muslim do not eat Pork products. It is against their religion.
Room with good bedding. Quilt, cover, pillow, and bed sheet. Appropriate temperature as we are also comfortable with.
Toiletries, soap, soft sponge, towel.
Encourage the YP to have a shower and brush teeth.
Most Young unaccompanied have not brush their teeth before, most YP have problems with their teeth. Gradually the YP will get use to the brush and tooth paste provided.
Only elderly people sleep on beds in some Countries and the children sleep on mats, spread on the floor. Sleeping on the bed, for the first time might be a good experience, but fear of falling off from the bed.
The YP need to be taught of using a bathtub and shower. You need to put a gripping rubber mat inside the bath to prevent falls.
They are used to having bath in the river, where the also wash their clothes.
Make the YP relax, by showing what each item you are giving to him or her is used for, and how to use them.
Show how to operate the shower for the hot and cold water.
Provide a container for the sponge, the tooth brush and paste.
The Kitchen Utensils and appliances, need to be shown to the YP, what they are called and how to use them.
Plan the daily routine from Day 1.
Time to wake up in the morning.
Time for Shower, wearing clean clothes, Breakfast, and when to leave home for school or college.
Lunch Pack. Water or drinks
Day of the week to clean the house environment and to wash his clothes.
When to iron his clothes and keep the iron safe after use.
Transportation:
For the first six to eight weeks, Paid Oyster will be used. It is expensive just same with the Adults Oyster.
You can only obtain free Oyster after you have obtained a School or College. You need the evidence from the College or School to be able to pay in the Post Office, and the Oyster will be posted to your address.
How to Apply for 15 to 16 years old can be found on Tfl website.
Take The YP photo. Complete the form on line and insert the photo.
If you make mistakes, you can easily correct it.
Payment could only be made at the Post Office. Not every Post Office receive Oyster payment. Find out from other FC and when it is time to do it.
If Placement is from May or June.
Register the YP or enrol the YP in the College.
He or she has to be registered in the local library, prior to September when the school or the College starts.
Pin to use to access the internet will be given to the YP, which he can use at any time, that he visits the library.
The Foster Carer will be teaching how to read, write, listen, and understand the way other people speaks.
Buy Books from Bookshops, alphabets, and how to pronounce words.
Implementation of all that has been planned with good approach, patience, resilience, listening, observing the behaviour or any changes.
Buying the YP a phone that can use Wi-Fi. I was made aware that this is a gift, and I can not claim the money back.
The phone will be used for maintaining contacts with friends and families.
To play games.
To access the internet, and study.
Education on the Awareness of the dangerous people on line, using unknown websites that can put them in trouble.
Independent living skills:
Street wise.
Able to travel alone.
Connections of Train and Buses.
Maintaining personal hygiene and oral care
Fire safety at home.
Cooking without supervision
Eating adequate meals
Budgeting and managing money
Washing and wearing clean clothes
Washing machine.
Washing and Ironing clothes
Cleaning the environment as planned in the House rules
Regular attendance to College.
Evaluation of Care:
Report has to be given from time to time to the YP Social Worker, the SSW, and the Team.
Important record keeping is important part of the care.
For LAC Reviews meetings and future references.
Immigration:
Soon as the Young Person arrives in placement, please find out if he has got a Solicitor before he left the Home Office. If he has none, you as the Foster Carer will find one for the Young Person. You need to book an appointment with the Solicitor, for the Personal Statement form to be completed and return to the Home office at a stated date.
Remember you might need to visit the Solicitor more than 3 times.
To give personal statements.
The Solicitor will ask the YP questions and explore his journey from his Home Country to the UK, with him or her.
Second visit is to correct any mistakes and clarify all that have been written before sending the statement back to the Home Office.
Communication between you and the Solicitors will continue until the end of the process.
The Home Office interview date will determine when you will accompany the Young Person to the Home Office.
Appeal Procedure:
If the Application fails, the Appeal Procedure will start.
The Solicitor will invite the YP.
The Foster Carer will need to accompany the Young Person to the Solicitor and the Immigration Court of Appeal as many times as requested.
LAC Reviews, chaired by IRO, is held every 3 months for the YP, to monitor the how the placement is going, the needs and how they are met.
Prior to each meeting, Report will be written by the FC, completing the LAC form, this will be sent to the SSW, who will forward this to the IRO.
Report will be written by the YP SW.
Transition Period, Moving On to Semi-Independence:
I have cared for many young persons, and I am happy that I dedicated my time to make them achieve their goals.
Some continue to maintain contacts with me and visit me.
All the Skills needed for Independent living skills have been gained during placement period.
Semi Independent living in a shared accommodations.
Effect of Migration on Unaccompanied Minors.
Family Separation: Devastating effect on children.
Positive: Achievements, Family Reunion. Relationship
Negative: Effect on Mental Health, severe mental problem,
Lack of Motivation, Illegal Activities.
Drugs, Gangs, Radicalisation.
Outcome: Imprisonment or Deportation, send back to Home Country.
Transition to Semi Independent Living and the process.
The Leaving Care Team Officer, now based in Romford COOCOON, will be invited to attend the LAC Review meeting. To plan the future needs of the YP, prior to the 18th Birthday.
The Pathway Plan will include:
*Housing Options
*Education, training or employment needs, any financial or practical help to replace the Bursary.
*Relationships with family and friends
*Any practical skills he needs and how to get them.
*Any personal support he needs
*He will be allocated a Young Person's adviser.
*His Social Worker and the YPA will help along the way to get the best help and support.
*Part of the Pathway Plan will include a back-up plan (contingency) so it is not the end of the world, if things don't work out as planned.
Housing, sharing accommodation, in Semi Independent living .
Educational Needs, continue education in the College.
Working or Apprenticeship opportunities.
Support and where to get them
Finances
Stand alone. The YP should be able to function after many years of support independently from the age of 25years. This will depend of the YP capabilities.
Psychometric Assessment might be needed where a YP capabilities are minimal.
The Adult Social Services might be supportive to meet their needs.
By Rebecca Reid,
Foster Carer.
Stages in Seeking Asylum.
*Asylum Application
*Living in placement and going to College.
*Learning the language, learning the Culture.
*Knowing places. Integrate into the Community.
*Outcome of interview from the Home Office.
Either to stay temporarily in the Country till the final decision with take place, or giving a Residence Permit.
*Moving to Semi Independent place,
will be decided by the Children Services
*Continue to learn how to live independently.
*Moving to an Independent place
Or what is referred to as
*Stand alone with life.
The continuous support will be handed over to the Leaving Care Team up to certain age.
I built on my knowledge on daily basis. No one knows everything. Working as a Foster Carer is the Best Choice I have ever made after my Professional Career as a Mental Health Nurse in the UK
My mission accomplished.
Rebecca Reid.
Effect of Migration on ethnic minorities 
This is to enlighten all ethnic immigrants, of the way they can overcome the obstacles they will encounter in their respective host countries, and the experience of Rebecca Olugbode-Reid, a naturalised immigrant will be used to drive the points home.
Migrating, Seeking refugee or Asylum in another Country is not a crime. People fleeing for various reasons, such as war, persecution, economic problems, natural disasters, and many more. People from the third world think highly of the West, especially from what they watch over the television, on the internet, films news of the world and media in general. The way the government are able to stabilise and tackle inflation, making people aware of their entitlements, such as the care services, social services, pension schemes, and the forecasts, child benefits, incapability allowance, housing benefits, job seekers allowance, to mention few. Be aware that there are no soft touches any where these days, there is population explosion, economy of host countries suffering, due to the Country's kindness. Some refugees are taking undue advantage, exploiting the system and making life difficult for the genuine refugees and asylum seekers.
| Great Orphan of Africa Effect of polygamy on children, where ever it is practised in the whole world.  Born over fifty years ago, into a high class polygamous family, by a high class chief, and father was working as a chief agricultural officer, in a government agriculture institution, in one of the great cities of Africa. My grand father was the sixth King of the town of my birth.
|  Juvenile Delinquency
Charity begins at home as they say, this problem starts from parents, and pass on to the children. Violent parents who can not control their anger, and have outburst of aggressive behaviour during pregnancy, when babies are in utero.
Parents, who are fraudulence, buglers, drunk, and lazy individuals, pass on these behaviour to their children. Bringing children up in a violent environment, swearing at each other in the presence of little kis, unhealthy gossiping, and condemning other neighbours, whilst children are listening to your conversations. It is the responsibility of parents to make sure their children attend schools. Truancy in schools, shopping centres, and in the community is not acceptable. Government has a role to play, by providing more infrastructures, employ child psychologists to work with teachers, for early detection of problematic children from early childhood. Spending early on these problems, will produce good citizens of tomorrow, and will reduce crimes in future. Be aware that children are storing all these unacceptable behaviour in their brains, and will continue to grow with them. You as parent will be blamed, if you destroy your children's future.
A FOOL AT FOURTY WILL BE A FOOL FOR EVER Every minute counts in the life of every one of us, irrespective of your race, colour, age or creed. Any one who has attain the age of forty years, and has not made any substantial success, in life, might find it difficult to achieve a lot in later life. Most migrants might experience some great difficulties in their host Countries, but if you are lucky to find your way in time, I would advice you not to misuse that opportunity. You might be lucky to strike a deal in your business, win lottery, or hit a jackpot from a little investment. Some might be opportune to go to the University, or go for adult education, and make good use of it. Compared to those who had all opportunities, and still misused them, virtually due to greed, stupidity, lack of knowledge, and unwilling to learn from other people’s experience. If you are a daft, and you think you know it all, just because you have no insight into your problems, of pathological lying, you will learn dearly from your stupid mistakes. If you are lucky to be rescued at the last minute, by some one who is overwhelmed by emotions, who did not know that you can continue to deceive while you are in distress, to some one willing to rescue you genuinely, by robbing that person into difficulty, it means you have heart of stone. You should remember that some one you defraud to get what you wanted can still destroy you. You might feel you have got away, and you refuse to communicate with some one so good to you. Your evil plan is not to pay back what you borrowed; you can not escape this, because there is law of the land. You will learn in a hard way. You should be grateful towards any good you receive from anybody. No one knows tomorrow. Never have you repaid with ingratitude, shy away from your stupidity, hiding your head in the sand, refusing to communicate with those who can support you, because of you altitude to life, paranoia, and knowing yourself to be a user, bully and an abuser. There are many of you out there with this type of altitudes, towards your friends, colleagues at work, relatives, parents, and your families. Learn to pay back anything you borrow, so that in future, you will receive more help. Send me your feedback, contact me on my email. Rebecca Olugbode-Reid Rebeccareid47@gmail.com |  Effects of social exclusion or social deprivation on children
This could have a serious effect on any child, and it could be classified as a psychological abuse, and emotional abuse on the part of who ever is concerned. The restrictions could be from the biological parents, foster parents, or legal guardians who are very ignorant.
www.cornerstoneservices.co.uk
|  Dining with a Devil
There is no sign post attached to a devilish person to warn you of the dangers involved, and be aware your relationship with that person. Please be ware of anyone that you have not seen or lived with for over a year. His/her life might have changed drastically without your knowledge. If you take the risk and you failed to investigate properly before you get involved, you might find yourself in a mess. If you can study people carefully, or carry out a comprehensive assessment on the cognitive behaviour, and with the words of their mouth, mood, their behaviour, and the type of people they associate with, you can easily deviate from them before it is too late.
We human beings tend to be too sentimental at times and we take too many things for granted. Remember, some one very desperate, might be manipulative, with skeletons in their cupboards, many cover ups, and be very clever to get whatever he/she wants to achieve from you. They tell fibs and rope you in, mislead you. If you are the careless type, it might be too late for you, and you will find yourself in a serious trouble, before you realise the type of person you are dealing with. Amongst their groups, they are as anonymous as wall papers, they are difficult to penetrate. You have to take action to deal with the tricky colleagues, or devious people, who live all their lives in the shadow of hate and revenge. We must remember not to put human rights before security, if they break the law, they loose their rights, when you are dinning with a devil, you need a longer spoon.  They arrived in their host Countries almost naked, the The people received them with warm hearts, clothed them, provide them with free accommodation, on the expense of the tax payers, feed them with all their families and their dependants, and they are paying back with violence, killing innocent people who are who are working very hard to feed them. They have bitten the fingers that fed them, because they have no conscience. Our hearts flickering when going to work on Buses, Trains, Pubs, Parks, Restaurants, Hospitals and in the offices. They turned the world up side down for their evil acts. We must not allow these evil people to break us, or divide us, we need to be more at alert, and report to the Law Enforcement Agents, and the Police, if we notice anything suspicious in our vicinity, or the community as soon as possible.
You might be dealing with a green snake, under the green grass. Run away from danger.
www.cornerstoneservices.co.uk
SUICIDE BOMBING AND SELF HATRED If you hate yourself, you can never love any one. This is why you are vulnerable and you are brain washed to become a suicide bomber, killing innocent people with your self. You are able to carry out their evil because you are evil yourself, with hopelessness, and emptiness in your head. You put your in adequacies and faults on other people, taking your anger of your life failure on people who never met you before. If you are hurt and you want to protest, you can write in the news papers, write to the television, we have hundreds of channels, always willing to listen and help, blog in any language, talk to who you confide in, not those who will strap you with suicide belt, and brain wash you to go and kill yourself, and kill hundreds of happy people going their own ways. If you hate the West, stay in your Country of origin. If you believe killing people will make you a martyr, you are wrong, sick in your head, and deceiving yourself, you will go to hell, and the almighty God will punish you. Its all brain wash, wickedness, and cruelty. People who send you to go and commit atrocity sat down in their houses, watching you dying horrible death, and laughing inside them, because they are psychopath. Your parents and families will be grieving after your departure, and the stigma you left behind, will hunt them for life. Think, those of you who are still out there, thinking of when you want to strike, you will be caught ,and defeated, you will spend the rest of your life behind bars. You break the law, you loose your right. You can not break us, you can not stop our children going out, we will continue to be happy, while you will remain miserable all your life, the whole world will turn against you. | War against indiscipline Go Back Up
 Spitting is a health hazard, and unpleasant for people who walk around on the pavements, corridors, and people playing on the fields. Every good citizen must show good moral, where ever we are. Writing on the wall, which is another eye sore. Vandals, abandoning cars, littering the streets with plastic bags, empty cans of drinks, taking trolleys from shops to your homes, noise making, fowl languages and unruly behaviour to neighbours. Smoking is damaging to your health and can kill you. You are making other people's lives miserable, and causing unrepairable damage others people's lungs, by passive smoking. You need help as soon as possible.
| Teachers/Parents with outburst of aggression
 In those days, teachers are known as tin gods in the schools, and pupils are always at their best behaviour. Nowadays, it appeared opposite, due to many changes in law, unruly behaviour of children from home, juvenile delinquency, truancy, effect of drugs, and stimulants on children, and the effect of human rights law. Parents tend to overlook some of the problems and the unruly behaviour of their children at home, and the reports from teachers. Instead of these ignorant parents to work with the teachers, to put things straight from the onset, or before things get worse, instead, they put all their frustration, guilt, and anger on the teachers. See the Sunday Express July 25th,2004.Father violently attacking a teacher in front of a classroom, full of children. What sort of message was that, to those frightened children. The law will not spare such unruly behaviour. It is un acceptable, in any civilised Country. Parents are jailed over truancy teenagers. I knew from my own experience that many teachers are intolerable from their homes, bringing their frustration, anger, and inadequacy to work. They extend their behaviour to their classrooms, and the innocent students. However, some teachers take laws into their own hands because they are in authority, they can fail, or intimidate the vulnerable students. If a teacher has little grudges against a student, he will start picking on little mistakes, bullying, and verbally aggressive towards the student, threatening to punch the poor student, in the office, without any one to help, at that particular time. In some cases, there are some teachers around, who are also bullies, and make the student their victim. They sit round the table, and laughing their head off, or making their own remarks against the student in their midst. The student can not retaliate, because he fears expulsion from the institution. Some teachers pass horrible remarks, asking of what the student think he or she will become in few years to come, comments that are terrifying and very frightening, which is depressing to the student. The worst of all is a teacher referring to the student's Country of origin as being backward, in education, and as if they are aliens. My believe is that, no student's destiny is in any teacher's hand. www.cornerstoneservices.co.uk | Anxiety Generated Officer
 In any society we have some people who are naturally anxious, or suffering from all sorts of anxieties. It is worse if you happen to be working in the same department, having him or her as a little boss, acting while the senior boss is away on holidays.These type of people can not take decision on their own, they blow little things out of proportion, they spread stress around their department, so that their horrible impact could be felt by everybody. They are self centred type of people, their "motto" is "ME" all the time. rebeccareid3@hotmail.com |
 LAILA'S CHAOTIC RELATIONSHIP
 Laila was a young beautiful woman, with four other siblings, who lost both biological parents in civil war that broke out in their Country several years ago. She struggled so hard to survive, caring for her brothers and sisters. Every thing was in chaos, schools were destabilised, no drinking water, no electricity, no dispensary.
The wounded were being cared for mostly by traditional healers, Red cross from different Countries. It took a long time before the re-organisation of the Government to take place. The rehabilitation, reconstruction of roads took a decade. Laila's other siblings were then taken away by the missionaries, and were cared for in the convent. Laila refused to go with others, and decided to live in her parents house. She engaged in farming, planting maize, cassava, vegetables. She had two goats, owned by her parents, which she cared for, and sell their milk every morning, to the villagers to feed herself. rebeccareid3@hotmail.com | SHORT POEM MEETING YOU ON MY JOURNEY  Meeting you on my journey. You asked me where I was coming from, I told you I was coming from where I had lost everything I needed for my life, Love, security, compassion, and my future.
You asked me what I was looking for, I told you I was looking for love, security, compassion, and my future. You asked me what my objectives were. I told you that my objectives were my life ambitions, of which I had been deprived. You asked me why I appeared depressed, and frustrated. I told you that I had suffered a physical abuse, psychological abuse, social abuse, emotional abuse, and spiritual abuse. Yet I refused to turn back; I held on to my faith, and my hope. My hope in the Lord never wavered, and at last, it had proved to be well founded. by: REBECCA BOLA OLUGBODE-REID
| EFFECT OF STRESS ON MENTAL HEALTH  INTRODUCTION
The topic aims to look at the concept of stress and illness which set the parameters within which important factor in stress aetiology acting as mediators for pathology, will be employed in depth. Stress is also a foundation of many psycho-physiological disorders/effects. It upsets this delicate balance of the homeostatic mechanism which may result in psycho physiological disorders. It is important to note that psychological stress give rise to physiological response, and physiological stress give rise to psychological manifestations The topic I have chosen to write is about effect of stress on mental health of the migrants, an area of great relevance to the work of mental health professionals, doctors, office workers, law enforcement agents, soldiers, politicians, and personal level. Remember, that your life becomes more precious, when you are about to loose it, so they say. Stress is the adverse internal and behavioural responses experienced by an individual to one or more influences which have physical, emotional or social origins. Stewart (1985). The rationale for undertaking an-depth study of the subject is to increase my knowledge base of this complex, construct of the biological and behavioural/science with its relationship to illness, and as a mental health professional, integrate them to practise, education research and management. This will no doubt raise my own level of self-awareness in relation to my stressors, stress response and coping mechanism. Hence learning occurs not only at a cognitive level but also in the affective domain. PURCHASE YOUR COPY www.cornerstoneservices.co.uk | TEENAGE HEALTH EDUCATION  This is an article which describes a Public Health issues. The approach allows the Health professional to develop a strategic response to the increasing problems of teenagers.
Unhealthy behaviours in teenage children, such as drug and alcohol misuse, smoking and pregnancy, create a significant challenge for Primary Health Care Teams. Social deprivation compounds the problems, as the incidence of such behaviours is inversely related to social class and education attainment. Car stairs and Morris(1991) showed that the link between deprivation and ill health, as measured starts at birth, continues through life and culminates at death. The gradients in mortality are steepest for young adults, but can be seen in all age groups. Parents play an active part in personal and social development for young people. Nutrition, maintaining personal hygiene, good morals at home, in schools, and in the community. Parents listening to children, and be more available for them, to show love, support and affection. Most children search for love lost in their homes, in the community, and they never return home. Involvement of children in charity or voluntary work, sports, reading groups, prevent teenagers from wandering the streets, and keeping bad company and gangs in public places, pubs, and committing crimes. Most girls are lured into prostitution and drugs, and some with unwanted pregnancies, under the age of sixteen years. Teenage conception rates in the UK compare unfortunately with other countries Scott Et Al (1995) agued that the foundation for the Dutch figures was laid over 20 years ago. The Government opposed to the good quality information, and education about sex for young people, and by open attitudes to sex generally, and high quality, user friendly clinical services. These services are typically non moralistic, confidential and client centred. Attempts to apply these lessons in the UK that time was opposed by the argument that these strategies only encourage sexual experimentation. But Lenderyou and Swindon (1995) noted the opposite effect.
cornerstoneservices.co.uk | LONELINESS  Loneliness is a psychological phenomenon having powerful implications on mental health and illness, as indicated by Ryan and Patterson.
If loneliness is not resolved, or the migrant is not supported or assisted, the individual may experience suicidal thoughts or ideations, inability to function, loss of appetite, will result in loss of weight, inability to sleep, depression irritability, paranoia, over sensitivity, loss of self esteem, loss of confidence, and self isolation. Peplau described loneliness as an extremely unpleasant experience, so dreaded and so painful that it must be disguised. This subjective state is described as a "Vague, dysphonic, reactive response to the more or less temporarily separation from persons and things, one has endowed with meaning, import, and energy" www.cornerstoneservices.co.uk |
FEAR OF THE UNKNOWN  You are not alone, give yourself another chance, do not give up, take responsibility for your actions, do not blame anybody, and do not quit. You might be a boss, trying your best to satisfy everybody working with you, some of these people appeared to appreciate your work, some do not. You can not be hundred percent perfect, and you can not please everybody.
You might be evil, negative in your heart, trying to protect yourself from future failure, but with manners to cover up. For along time, you get away with most awful things un noticed, all will be out one day. People are frightened to speak out, because of your bullying and aggressive ways. You demand things to be done your own ways, and you always know best. You might be showing favouritism to some people who are your puddles, who you feel are loyal to you, and therefore upsetting some minorities. You might be the arrogant and selfish boss, power drunk, highly influencial, who concentrated on your own needs and aims with no regard for others, and do not listen to the advice or opinion of less privileged in your organisation. Communication is a two- way process. There are wise people amongst the people you ignored, and they take record of all your behaviour and actions, on daily basis, these are the people who will befall you at the end. The life span in that career is fast moving, take a look at yourself, this is 21st century, because you feel, and think you are one of the untouchables, with your cheap popularity, and because you feel you have connections. You have forgotten that no condition is permanent, with your bullying management style, and no exitement. You decided to hold tightly to things, the end of your era might come when you do least expect. Over confidence can also destroy you, if you are not wise with it. You need to prove your worth, and boost the egos of the organisation that you are working for, not running around telling fibs, and old stories. Let the world hear about this organisation and their great achievements, since it was established.Continue to ask yourself,your own contribution towards these achievements,and what you have been doing to promote the existence of this company. You have been giving enough chance, but you failed to make good use of it. Probably they need other people they can trust, who would pull their weight, and take people with them. If you are not at peace with yourself there will be complications in your life, and you will not be able to relate to people, you nap at little things. You lost faith in every one, who can stand by you, in the times of trouble. You need to train your mind of how to deal with issues, and stop sitting on pins. No job security anymore, nothing goes for ever. Be motivated, improve on your self esteem, be bold, and be brave, feel good in yourself all the time. rebeccareid3@hotmail.com SHORT POEM  Flowers die, stories end, songs fade, memories are forgotten
All things come to an end, But the precious people like any one we love, and adored, are treasured for ever. Even though I'm walking slowly, I'm not walking backwards. THE ABUSERS  An abuser is anyone that is taking advantage of the vulnerability of the other party.
Perverts, muggers,buglars, rapists, drunk drivers, bullies, human traffickers, are all under the same category. UNICEF UK estimates that hundreds, if not thousands of children are still being trafficked into the UK every year. In 2003, UNICEF UK’s report, Stop the Traffic! highlighted the horrific nature of this crime against children and told of the 250 known cases of children trafficked into the UK for domestic labour, sexual exploitation, benefit fraud between 1999 and 2003 . In the case of ‘Adam’ and others, it was for ritual sacrifice Trafficking
Human trafficking should not be confused with the smuggling of people. The smuggling of human beings takes place with the consent of the travellers. Trafficking on the other hand implies something much worse, that the travellers are unwilling or unknowing victims. UN Definition - Trafficking in persons means the recruitment, transportation, transfer, harbouring or receipt of persons, by the use of threat, force or other forms of coercion, of the abuse of power or of a position of vulnerability or of the giving or receiving of payments or benefits to achieve the consent of a person having control over another person, for the purpose of exploitation You are deliberately destroying people with your power, hatred, and your pen, you forget that no condition is permanent. The emotional scar and the trauma left behind will never be forgotten. What education will some one like you give to any child, because you are not useful to yourself, to your family, to the community, or to the Government. Your mind is full of evil, but pretending to be an Angel. Search your conscience, how do you sleep, or relax, with all the emotional problems you have caused for your victims, those who can speak out, and be listened to, those who decided not to speak out because of the favour, or fear of not lossing their jobs, and protection they need from you, and those who can not speak for themselves. What ever you sow, you will reap. Put an end to your violent behaviour now. Remember the law of distributive justice. All you need is high dosage of love. www.cornerstoneservices.co.uk PARENTING   Parenting is an everlasting responsibility, but people are wondering, whether it is a right or a privilege.
In my own opinion, I feel it is a privilege. It is very awkward when some parents shift all their responsibilities to a nanny, because she is working for them, and earning. Co parenting is important, as well as good role model to the children, either you are separated or live together. You can not be a good role model if you drink excessively, take drugs, or be a burglar, or a mugger. Working lives of parents could be tedious, and stressful, but we need to put our children future first in our hearts. You have to pay mortgages, bill ,and satisfy the inland revenue. Search round for where you can obtain job satisfaction, and employers who are flexible. Some give up their children up for adoption, because they feel they can not cope. The question is, why did you decide to have this child in the first instance, you are not forced to having a baby. Some rely on the old parents, who are partially or finally retired. These retired people can only help when they feel like, not imposing your own responsibity on them, because you want to work or because you want time to enjoy yourself. The old people need time, to enjoy the fruits of their labour, visit interesting places, and relax, now you want to finish them with endless stress. If Boarding House or orphanage is your choice, all have their own adverse effects.Remember, your children need you physically, to shower them with love,and affection, which will grow with them. If you fail to do this from the beginning of their lives,the vacuum will remain there,money can not buy happiness or replace you, and the implications are more serious in future. Your children deserve good quality of life. Set your children free when you are sure it is save to do so.The age to set them free will vary from one child to the other, depending on their achievements, academically, physical capabilities, mental stability. Allow any child to be in full education to the age of twenty one, at least. This time, he/she will be able to assess any danger, and will take precaution, and responsibility, if any danger is round the corner. Teenagers fail to fear any danger, they want to go on holidays on their own, parents should be there, to protect and guide them. Please ensure you let them know, that security in most Countries are not adequate, people take laws into their own hands, treating strangers any how, because you might not understand their language, and knowing your ways around. If you are in group, with friends together on holidays, you will be safe to move around, and get back to your hotel together, not getting lost, into the hands of wicked people. Teenagers always like to talk, and open their minds, if you give them chance to do so. If you shout, nag, or swear, at little things they do, you will drive your teenage child away, and to get them back is not going to be an easy task for you .Make sure you are not over protective, or over possessive in your ways, there will be problems. Every thing has to be proportionate. Never you allow them to be frustrated by your behaviour , when they are in the midst of their friends. Learn to praise them, and motivate, when they are achieving well, do not push too much. Most children are selfish, let them know you love them, but create a boundari |
